Humans are nutty sometimes.
We SAY we want to achieve a goal or finish a project, then BAM! We sabotage ourselves.
Let’s figure out why your clients aren’t getting the success they say they want.
Today’s blog post is all about the 10 mental Saboteurs – the ten ways our self-talk and behavior kill our success, as outlined by Shirzad Chamine, author of Positive Intelligence.
Here’s a quick overview of each Saboteur. Use this with your clients and mastermind group members. It will shift the stuck places and get them moving forward faster. (Hey, take a look at these for your own ah-ha moments! Maybe you’re holding yourself back??)
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Note: No one is one-sided. You could have a sprinkling of several of these Saboteur behaviors. Perhaps these Saboteurs only rear their ugly heads when you’re in a highly stressful situation? Profiles like DISC, Kolbe, and Myers-Briggs encourage us to see ourselves in a 360-degree view.
Chamine discusses each of these Saboteurs, where your focus is, what thoughts are going through your head, and how this can lead to feelings that block forward motion and success (and ultimately, happiness and fulfillment).
When you’re aware of these self-sabotaging behavior patterns, you can work with your clients and members to turn them around.
Do you recognize your clients in any of these behaviors? (Or in yourself? I sure can!)
Yes, Saboteur behavior can be your downfall. But in small doses, these Saboteurs can be helpful in some situations. For instance, the Controller is the leader. Most groups of people desire someone who can make strong decisions and lead the way.
Taken to the extreme, if the Controller can’t balance their need to manage every situation, task and person involved, it easily becomes a negative environment where no one thrives.
And take heart – there’s a calm, optimistic Sage within who can help overcome these self-sabotaging behaviors and have you performing at your peak potential!
Research indicates self compassion balances the negative effect of the our own sabotaging behavior and thoughts. To mention two people who have done research on this area are Kristin Nuff and Brene’ Brown.
I appreciate the article as you highlight the roadblock to vetting secession in life. Thank you
If we can be kind to ourselves, Brenda, it goes a long way to finding happiness and motivation. I like what Chamine says in his YouTube video (TEDx talk) — that instead of saying, “Oh, I’ll never get this right! I’m all wrong!” says “Oh, look: my Saboteur is saying I’m all wrong, isn’t that interesting?”
When we take a step back from our self-talk and realize our Saboteur is doing a lot of the talking, it creates a sense of release. When we *notice* it without taking it to heart, it helps.
P.S. I love Brene Brown’s work, as well as everyone who says, “You ARE enough! You ARE worthy!” 🙂